RUN NO. 2271
DATE: 28 FEB 2012
SITE: SPG 787 JLN MUARA, KG SALAMBIGAR
HARES: NICKI TC/DUCHESS OF CAMBRIDGE/CALL GIRL
Confused ramblings of a self-confessed occasionally delusional hasher.
Right well it’s 4pm on Tuesday afternoon and the kids are safely ensconced in the house doing homework or playing with something so it’s my time to get ready to go to hash – I have luckily remembered that Jane (who could have had a hash name by now as I thought of a good one while I was JM that combined one of the main tenets of physiotherapy with the way she hashes and her hash job and had a great Bruneian flavour but by the time inspiration struck me I was almost out of the job and Jane missed a couple of shout-ups so that’s that she’ll have to wait until some other time) asked me to bring the ice but I can’t go back to the place I used last week because while I was busy paying for the ice I didn’t notice the man helpfully trying to put the ice into the boot of my car not realising that the boot hydraulics don’t work properly so instead of staying up when he let it go it fell straight down on his head and I was sure he was going to bleed all over the place so I’m definitely not going there again – anyway I’ve decided to try a new place along jalan muara where I will lock the car and not open it until I am there to ensure that that the accident (once is an accident while more than that must be on purpose) doesn’t happen again.
– on my way to Diva’s old house which is Nicky’s new abode I get caught in the usual jalan muara traffic jam which I had forgotten about as I haven’t driven this way for some time I contemplate writing to Diva to tell her about the hash tonight but decide that a facebook note would be just as good knowing full well that the way I usually get distracted by stuff means that the likelihood of this actually happening is not promising and that means I’m not the best friend in the world but surely a true friend would forgive me – feeling pleased with myself as I also remembered it was a road run tonight so I’ve worn sneakers rather than my knobbly old hash boots.
I sign in and then talk to various people while waiting for Catherine to toot the horn to start the hash which she does in due course and away we all go down the hill and along the main road before veering sharp right onto a side road which has a steep hill that I decide should be conquered by jogging up it (always incredibly optimistic at the start of a hash) and then along the road we go – pass some graffiti which says ‘dogy style’ which annoys me on so many levels as not only is it polluting the environment it is also spelt incorrectly and moreover true ‘doggy style’ would involve being tied together after mating by intimate body parts for at least an hour which although it would mean compulsory tender cuddling moments (nice) could also necessitate some extremely embarrassing emergency phone calls (not nice)
– by this time the front runners are searching for first check so I go further down the road and low and behold there’s the check so I call it through then continue to where the paper turns left again into an orchard/farm area but by that time Peewee has found paper further along the road so I decide to just keep on the road winding my way through a lovely little kampong where the people are so friendly that a nice old couple wave to me and a younger guy driving passed gives me a thumbs up sign and a little girl sitting in a window waves and shouts hello – back on the main road I make my way to the shout-up passing an overly friendly strange dog that was very lucky not to be run over and the back-horn who had accidently cut out on an earlier road
– thanks to Call girl and Nicky and the Duchess of Cambridge for providing us with a run even after all the jungle they had planned to take us through was removed by the ‘lets make jalan muara an even busier road than it is’ committee as well as a lovely dinner in the form of sloppy joes and pudding which is a treat – the shout up had Sue performing her new duty for the first time which she did very well even telling a joke so I’m sure that her and Cheryl have got this hash sorted – a first time guest was introduced and a couple of returning hashers were toasted as well as a new hasher signed up – afterwards was the time for imbibing various beverages while indulging in some philosophical discussions – please feel free to put in any punctuation you deem necessary to make this missive legible and I’ll see you all next week at diplo where the run will be longish with a couple of interesting river crossings if its fine or shorter with some slippery mud if its wet – onon.
NEXT RUN: DIPLO