Tuesday, August 22, 2017

RUN NO. 2556 SPG 420 JLN MUARA 15AUG2017

DATE: 15 AUG 2017

….. Arriving early for a change, I was able to grab a sweet parking spot and taking Hornbill’s wise advice, took my chair and change of clothes with me as I staggered up what I thought at the time might be the worst hill of the whole hash – the simpang that goes up to the house – to sign in.

In due course, we were ready to embark on Duchess’s birthday celebration run. Hens set off down the simpang and after a quick walk along the road headed up into the jungle with Little Miss Gobby taking front horn and Twinkletoes on back horn.

We headed past the moonscape towards the Gurkha trails but after traversing one of the lesser used tracks we turned left and joined back onto the main Lucky Garden loop. With mutterings about the trail being a possible A to B, hopes were high that it would be a simple matter of following the ridge down to the road. But no, wait there’s more!

Down into the depths of Lucky Gardens we headed and again were hopeful that we would just follow along the bottom of stream and out. Yet again we were wrong but how bad can it be? If you guessed really bad, you were right.

The trail turned right up the aptly named F*#k Off Hill – so named as everyone tends to take one look at the gradient and size of the hill and exclaims “F*#k Off, I’m not climbing that”! After much swearing, huffing and puffing I arrived at the top with layers of sweat lying upon layers of sweat in the humid conditions. Luckily no more nasty surprises awaited us along the trail and in fact we shortly arrived at Point B which was our usual Lucky Gardens in trail.

We were met by smiling hares offering a welcome Mojito cocktail. After a short wait, our mini bus arrived and we bundled in for our drive back to Point A. An even more welcome surprise came when our lovely driver took us right up the house and the dreaded simpang hill walk was avoided. The trail showed up on my Sports Tracker at just over 4 ½ km and our little group of ladies walked it in about 1 ¼ hours.

A big thank you to hares Duchess, Hornbill, Trailblazer, Pedigree Pup and Led Astray with help also from Silent Knight. Shout up saw our wonderful hares and horns thanked.

We were happy to welcome three first time guests: new CfBT teacher Cindy from South Africa (brought by Wonder Woman), JIS teacher Yvette from England (brought by Icy Bitch) and Jo an Aussie working at the Australian High Commision (brought by Carol). Guests were quickly down downed in an effort to halt the flow of non-PC comments by our lovable, crazy JM. Under the Radar was called up to receive her 50 run potty and reminisced about her first run at Mentiri which was laid by Gin Trap. She was signed in by Super Trooper and despite a near vertical hill scramble on the so called ‘easy trail’, Under the Radar made the brave decision to join H3.

It was then time for the birthday celebration of our lifetime member, Duchess, who has now completed 1350 runs if I heard correctly. Congratulations from us all, Duchess! Other August birthday hashers were invited up with just Holly answering the call so a very special Happy Birthday was sung to, I think, our oldest and youngest H3 hash members standing up together.

Three announcements were made. Firstly, Hash Cash, reminded everyone that next week is the last chance to pay subs due and if not paid, names will be removed and hens will not receive Founders’ Day goodies. So pay up please – don’t say you haven’t been warned! Secondly, Mrs Pingu, told us that Kids Hash was coming up this weekend at Diplo. New families are welcome. Lastly, a reminder that the 7-in-7 September hash registrations were closing on 16th August.

Under the Radar was in the limelight again but this time for hashshit as she had signed in and out in the wrong place. Hannah B was assigned the key task of brandishing the hose which she did with aplomb. Hares provided a delicious meal and hens enjoyed a fine evening eating, drinking and chatting as hens do when in good company. Shout up finished with instructions regarding next week’s run at Subok 67 which will be an unusual B to A .

HARES: SUBOKETTES. Pls park sensibly - Not beyond the gates at the beginning, and at the onon at the DuchessOC., NO PARKING in the Simpang please.  Do bring a chair if you have one.

Monday, August 14, 2017


RUN NO. 2555
DATE: 8 AUG 2017


Friday, August 11, 2017


RUN NO. 2554
DATE: 1 AUG 2017

As Pussy Galore wheel-spinned into the hash site at 5:15, she vaulted out of her car and seized the front horn to lead the hens into the jungle.

We fought our way through long wavy grass and did a long climb to be welcomed by the mind-blowing view of the ocean and jungle…we are very lucky to live in such a magnificent place. The front runners (or walkers really!) decided to mix things up and accidentally took the hens in backwards into the jungle. Unknowingly we all did the run backwards and had fun finding checks on a backwards run, but through sheer drive, tenacity and determination we fought against the pressure and led the hens out to safety. Thanks hares for a mix of growth-under, hills steep (burners slow), views stunning, outcrops rocky and grass high (ha ha the backwards run!!).

Leaving the jungle, we were welcomed with delectable gin popsicles where we forgot that we were hot and sweaty from the run but instead at a swim up bar on a tropical island surrounded by our best friends.
As we gathered for the shout out under the stars (the tent and the G&T’s falling victim of car failure), we sat in a circle on child car seats and surf boards as we gathered in to listen to Psycho retelling tales of old where she once created a jungle inferno and nearly set Satu Lagi’s child on fire. We sat wide mouthed and eager to hear more historic hash stories where there was only one beer and the hens took a quick swig and passed it on…those must have been desperate times. Imagine a life without blues, greens and G&T?

Yikes…it doesn’t bare thinking about. Hares this week were Gin Trap, Icy Bitch, Little Miss Gobby and super guest Fi from the UK. We applauded their efforts
and said hello to five (yes FIVE) new guests. Emily from the UK (brought by Tiger Moth) who was visiting on holiday with her Mum, Fiona (who was also a guest brought by Rachel). We also welcomed Fi from the UK who has been in Brunei for two years and has been busy being super mum but is now ready to embrace the ladies hash.

We think she did a great job at teasing Gin Trap to nearly get her into trouble by purposely forgetting her hash handle, she’s one of us already!! We also said hello to Fiona from Ireland who has been here for one year and was brought by Sophia. Our last first time guest was CfBT’er Kathryn from Canada who is really pleased to be in BSB after living in KB and she was brought by Hash Hound. Hannah from Scotland became a fully-fledged member of the hash who spoke fondly of her first run at Subok (Thanks Patsy and Pee Wee) and was brought by Under the Radar. Welcome Welcome Welcome.

 Announcements this week detailed information about 7/7 in September. Application form is in the words and deadline is mid August, so get a wriggle on if you want to be part of the madness. Little Miss Gobby informed us that Kindermusik starts in two weeks so speak to her if you would like further information.

We congratulated Gin Trap as she reached her 100 run milestone. Super effort GT and you even came back after impaling your leg with Bunny Girl during your first Jalan Muara run. We were even given a treat of seeing the scar too! By this point, star gazing and beer guzzling, hash shit started with one and ended with three members enjoying the gift of ice cold water. Katie (for leaving an umbrella),

Where’s Wally for falsely accusing JM for inaccurately calling a hash handle and Hannah (new member) for signing her self in and then forgetting to write a tick after her name…. harsh hash shit call but they all took it well and were beaming with honour and pride after it.

Next week’s run is at Mentiri Waterfalls, please park sensibly off the highway. On-on is at Katie’s house.
Bring a chair

Monday, July 31, 2017

RUN NO. 2553 DIPLO 25JUL17

RUN NO. 2553
DATE: 25 JUL 2017
HARES: Canine Unit - Squeak/Twinkletoes, Holly, Wonder Woman, Duchess of Cambridge
FRONT HORN: Under the Radar         BACK HORN: Ripper

A special Canine Run with the sight of dogs among the hares at the get go. A smallish group as it's still summer holidays for both the international school families. Under The Radar was a virgin front horn who did pretty well learning to ropes. Lots of calling in the jungle too which made it easy for all to hear where everyone is.

Into the jungle we went exactly at 5:15 through the exit of the run of the previous week! Lots of paper in the jungle as many other chapters have been heavily using the site especially when we all know the countdown to the end of Diplo has started. The clever hares have printed paw prints and K9 on the paper as well as colored it which made it super easy to spot. Thank you hares!! First check was tough! It sent hens all over the place through many streams and trails. Finally an "On On, On Paper" was called with the check found by Gin Trap.

Off we went running along the trail filled with many twists and turns, jumping or tripping over roots with a few of commenting, "Hey, this is quite a nice easy run. Not too hilly!" Yeah right... Here comes the 1st major hill (why?!?!). What do we find at the top of the hill? Check number 2! There was a slight confusion in terms of calls which made this hen (LMG) very blur but at last on paper was found by Pussy Galore and Truffles the dog. Down the hill, along the stream, through the bog made by the stream, tall sharp grass but oh so beautiful monkey cups, more water! more mud, more grass, more hills and monkeys! We are finally out and during light. Woohoo! Mission accomplished.
Glamour seen on the trail

Some vertical climbs sideways

Lovely pitcher plants

Some water to finish the run

Shoutout started with the heartfelt thanks to the hares who were decked in their beautiful turquoise Canine Run H3 shirts.

No FTGs or new members but we got a naming! Dear Siaw Yan who from the start has been very helpful, lending a hand to fill in the jobs on the committee and drives a pseudo Knight Rider was renamed by Ripper and GM Hash Hound (dressed in thick jackets! :s and sunnies) to 'Silent Knight'. Shout out ended with Hash

Entertainment in the form of Hashit for *gasp* Wonder Woman! (this is the 2nd ever Hashit she's gotten since the start of her hashing journey) for losing her chair WHICH she carried to her car.. WHICH was found by one of the men hashers the following days..

The infamous Jalan Muara laksa was served which was delivered by Making Bacon at a very.. untimely time? Heh.. while many hens were at their cars changing. :p

Next week's run is at Rapier Range. It is a new trail SO please, cover up yourselves and make sure you have your torches and a fully charged phone! IF you're not at first check by the 30 minute mark, please turn back as the trail would get harder after first check. Hash Smart! Be safe.. On On! Little Miss Gobby, Gin Trap, Icy Bitch

Saturday, July 22, 2017

RUN NO. 2552 DIPLO 18 JULY 2017

RUN NO. 2552
DATE: 18 JUL 2017
HARES: Squeak/Twinkletoes/Holly/Never Wrong
Taking in the entry before Diplo is closed for Embassy building

Wild Orchids

Getting ready for start
Off they go in

Once upon a time there were 4 ladies who wanted to get some exercise on a Friday and Sunday morning. They met with dogs to plod the Diplo trails - The dogs, of course, getting far more exercise than them. The ladies would chat and put the world to right. The dogs were intent on checking out new trails, bush crashing and sniffing out the wild life. Jess’s sole mission was to find and sit in as much mud and water as possible. And so was born the “Canine Unit”. Whilst the dogs were unable to attend the actual run they were taken in later and this is their account. Woof Woof? (translation—Are we going for a walk?) Come on Jess and Zulu get in the car. We are going to diplo. We are going to meet Billie, Spot and Kaz! Wag Wag! Your butt smells good today. What’s that smell over there? Just have to go and investigate! Sniff Sniff Sniff—Woof Woof. “Squirrel” “Grrrr I’m leader of the pack. “ thinks Billy “No it’s me!” demands Zulu—the others content to have a walk in the jungle.
A bit of wet trail

 “Oh where have the humans gone now? Why didn’t they follow me? I know the way. Up this hill, down this hill, through this bush (why are the humans taking the long way round?), under the log, round the puddle” (but if you are Jess you go through the puddle and roll in it and put your head under the sloppy water, then stand next to a human and shake to share the love!) This week’s run will have plenty of fallen logs to jump over or go under, hills to climb—two of three times if you wish to go back and check on those still coming up the hill. There will be lots of water if Jess has any say in it and squirrels to run after. Butt sniffing is optional to the humans on the trail. No fighting over pack leader please, there’s a front horn. The dogs are hoping for bones at the on on.
Duchess updating the goings on at Eurohash in Vienna when she joined Smurf/Goodnight Kiwi/Puteri & Duke of Cambridge

Doris after a few years in Brunei and intermittant ladies hashing is now going home to Vienna with her family.

Carol & Survivor celebrating July birthdays with a pavlova.

Hashit for Sophia forgetting to sign out 


Monday, July 17, 2017


RUN NO. 2551
DATE: 11 JUL 2017

.. As the sun weakly glinted through the surrounding clouds, a dedicated band of hashers gathered together at the mud flats at the entrance into Lucky Gardens. The afternoon’s rain had left puddles all over the road and turned one side of the street into a quagmire, as Sophia found out to her dismay. The hash tried valiantly to push her car out of the mud, muttering about fulcrums and gear ratios, but in the end it was no use, so it was decided to leave the car where it was and start the hash.

We started in on the trail about 10 minutes late, Bunny Girl jingle jangling with the leaver’s bells (best of luck for the future!), scrambling up the bank to where an old workers’ hut used to be.

The trail went into the loop, then left up the hill onto the ridge line. From there, we headed straight down to the anti-terrorist building and followed the long fence round to the next ridgeline. After another traipse along the top of the ridge, we descended into valley and across the first bridge (thank you hares for not putting us across the alternative fallen tree log route!). Now the trail turned hard left and wandered along the lakeside, offering delightful views of the surroundings. I’ve long suspected that those gorgeous travel shots you see in National Geographic and the like are taken just like this – the view outward looks gorgeous, but if you looked down at your feet (which you really had to do here!) all you could see was puddles, mud and tree roots waiting to catch you and hurl you to your knees. By this time the paper was growing sparse, but luckily we were back near the loop so it was not long before the ‘out’ sign appeared and we made it back safely to the sign out sheet.

After standing around chatting for a while, I picked up the signs and got in the car to drive to the shout up, and this is where the real trouble began. You see, I thought I knew where I was going and this was my first mistake. It was raining again by this time so I had my headlights on and my wind wipers going as I crept up along Jalan Muara in a stream of traffic. After driving fruitlessly around and around in circles, forlornly looking for an H3 sign to put me out of my misery, and with a now impatient and hungry teenager beside me, I decided to go to a little Thai restaurant I know and get some dinner. The Thai restaurant had changed owners since last time I had been there, and now doesn’t make the Thai green chicken curry I had promised myself, but they said that they are trying to hire the previous cook back and I should tell all my friends about the place (done).

I’m sure the shout up was delightful and I have seen from the video that Bunny Girl sung a delightful rendition of ‘Thank you for the hashing’ which was very well received. Thank you hares for a lovely run, I hope the shout up went well too! See you all next week at Diplo. (p.s I know where Tracey lives now)



Monday, July 10, 2017


RUN NO. 2550
DATE: 4 JUL 2017
HARES: Darlene/Edna/Footloose/Artful Dogger/Tiger Moth/Brittany

After waiting in the scorching heat for the horn to blow, I think everyone was happy to enter the jungle this week to try hide from the sun. The run was a distance of 5km with 3 checks, a variety of jungle, some never ending hills and a nice trail. Yogi beer led the way in as front horn and Sam I am had back horn.

Back at the On -On in Darlene's house hashers were proudly wearing red and white for the Canadian themed hash.

We had a very special guest just for the occasion, the high commissioner for Canada: Marina Laker. Marina generously brought along  t-shirts which were given out in a prize giving. She also got a group photo of everyone to publish on the Canadian high commissioner website.

Our own Canadian hashers were requested to all stand up with open mouths for some champers to be thrown down their throats (or tops).

Hash numbers are growing as we had 2 new members join, Tanya and Carol. Welcome, welcome!!

We also had a first timer from the UK, only here in Brunei for the summer to work at the summer camp in JIS. She was invited along by yogi beer. Yogi then got hash shit as her guest didn't down her drink on the hash song command. Hash shit was took very well though, Darlene even volunteered to have some to wash away the smell of champers from her top.

A returning Hasher from New Zealand also came along this week, she is returning to Brunei after 15 years away. She worked here when JIS first opened and now she is back for the 20 year Reunion there.

For some extra entertainment, Our host Darlene said some good jokes whilst looking the part in a jokers hat.

NEXT RUN: Lucky Gardens
HARES: Tracy/Katie W/Never Wrong/In Too Deep
On on will be further along at Jln Muara. Please bring a chair.